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Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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So, I head back to the office, and guess what? The printer’s still jammed. I’m about to lose it. I mean, how hard can it be? I finally get it working, and then my phone buzzes. It’s my friend, Jisoo. She’s like, “Let’s grab dinner at the Gyeongbuk-dong market!” I’m like, “Yes! Food fixes everything!”

Identity, photo of suspect behind robbery-murder case in Gimcheon made public